If That Won't Teach the Kids Subjunctive, What Will?

Yesterday, in the middle of going over the American Beauty script in my translation class, my professor stopped and asked us, the class, quite casually, "Have we gone over 'fuck' yet?" Immediately, everyone's ears perked up, because what college student doesn't love palabrotas*? Especially when nonchalantly inserted into academic context?

The next twenty minutes were spent discussing various Castilian vulgarities--convenient, considering the fact that everyday I wonder how I would verbally fend myself against unpleasant Spaniards should the need arise. Fortunately, that knowledge has now been bestowed upon me, for the low cost of $50,000 a year. But I digress.

Tapping the list of tacos** on the board with the chalk, the professor said, "Now, remember, if it starts with que,*** it's always subjunctive because it's really supposed to be espero que.****" Swear words and a grammar lesson in one? I say sí.*****

In case you are interested, here are some of the lovely phrases I learned (and don't forget to never say coger un taxi****** in Argentina):

joder

vete a la mierda

que te den

que te jodas

que te folles un pez

*bad words

**bad words

***that (in that particular context)

****I hope that

*****yes

******in Spain it means 'to get' or 'to grab,' but in Argentina it is a vulgar term